Monday, 15 February 2010

Close but no cigar

Unbelievable. I came that close. You see I was at school with Nige, who's a nice bloke, though I did once hit his twin brother on the nose for chatting up my girlfriend of the time. I'd even bought a ticket under T's instructions - she'd been to Primrose Hill for a yoga class and fancied a house up there. I mean, how close can you get?

There's only one thing for it:

Dear Nige

You may not remember me but I hit your brother on the nose when we were at school. I was wondering whether you might spare enough money for me to buy a house in a really nice part of London?

Yours, etc.

9 comments:

Sean said...

Thats serious FOff money, I will just have to console myself that I am a expert in telling folks to FO anyway..just without the serious cash to add insult to injury.

Good luck to em'

Gadjo Dilo said...

"We've got a lovely long list of people we're going to help and make their lives so much more comfortable". What lovely people. They're not going to quibble about putting one more name on that list, now are are they :-)

Nige said...

I feel I should point out that it's not me - and I'm actually rather glad. I mean, what wld you do....? Apart from buying Gaw a nice house of course.

Gaw said...

Sean: Perhaps you'd turn out like this chap?

Gadjo: When looked at objectively, I fear I may not rank that high.

Nige: The mere thought of hitting a brother of yours on the nose leaves me quite shaken. But, surely, of all the Nige's I know, I can think of none who would use £56m better. Imagine the cultural glories that could ensue! There's that Palazzo on the Rialto you've probably had your eye on for a start...

Brit said...

There was an endless feature on them on Points West (local BBC news) last night. We turned over after about 15 minutes when the envy got too much.

That really is a bewildering amount of money to come out of the blue. 50/50 as to whether it makes or ruins your life - huge mental strength required.

Gaw said...

Brit: It would be quite forbidding to manage. I think you'd end up much happier with a million or two, i.e. enough for you to spend and put to bed. Gadjo's quote referring to a 'lovely long list of people we're going to help': that list is never going to be quite long enough.

Brit said...

Yes - your relationship with everybody you know will change.

Gaw said...

BTW last time I was home I noticed Chris Vacher was still going strong on Points West. I remember when he was a fresh-faced young new presenter. He is now somewhat wizened and his flirting with the young dolly is looking incongruous.

Brit said...

Yep, and still Richard on the weather. They've got a stunner in the mornings these days but she's not on the website and I forget her name.